NSV - Episode 5: A Trail Runner's War Stories

One of the best things about running is the new avenue of experience opened by health & fitness. This past Memorial Day weekend, I was able to enjoy a series of adventures that would never have happened prior to my running life. My family hiked and climbed in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina several hours a day during a holiday visit to Oma & Opa. Being fit and strong made this exciting, delightful and fun, rather than a punishment. Moreover, the idea of NOT being active is now so foreign to us that such outings are simply a given as soon as breakfast is over.

Our first climb in the Pisgah National Forest was a moderately difficulty hike with a 40 minute ascent up the mountain, a cross-over on the mountain's ridge, followed by a steep descent. Several hours later, nearing the end of the trail, we encountered a six-foot long black snake--a MAJOR event for city folks like us and my five year old son. Yikes!

Thanks to suggestions from Opa and Oma Hetzel, we next headed to Dupont Falls. Our hikes were to wonderful waterfalls in the Dupont State Forest. We hiked down to High Falls and then over and down to Triple Falls. During this outing, I experimented with trail running. I've never tried my run on a rugged and steep surface such as mountain trails. And I loved it! The challenge of the terrain and the grades made it a great workout, especially for an urban flatlander like me. This adventure was made exhilarating by the spectacular waterfalls we visited. The wonder on my son's face was well worthwhile. And the cold spray of the falls felt pretty amazing after some serious uphill running.

Our last adventure in Dupont Falls is the source of my "war story." When I became a Weight Watcher's Warrior (I was dubbed so by my WW leader Peter), I didn't realize I'd be collecting battle stories along the way. This one comes courtesy of a mountain trail to the more remote Wintergreen Falls in Dupont Forest.

Giddy with the new challenge of trail running, I once again ran the terrain ahead of my family. I'd run the paths to the trail forks and then run back to my guys with directions. This back-and-forth continued all the way to the fall's descent. But I was having so much fun that I got careless. As you approach the waterfalls at any of these destinations, you encounter a stern (and scary) sign: "Danger! Steep cliffs and slippery rocks. Injury and Death possible." Well, I was so busy reading this ominous warning that I stopped watching my footing. And Boom! Tripping over a boulder, I took a good spill in two sharp moves--one smashdown to the shoulders and knees, followed by a whiplash move that sent my face careering into a rock.

After the shock to my body (and my pride--although I was all alone in the forest), I surveyed the damage, afraid to move. Calling for help from my guys--who had caught up to me on the trail, I found that despite some abrasions, bruises and a split lip later, I was without serious injury. Shaken but OK, we eventually climbed down to the falls in solitude, enjoying the wonderful scene.

I have to admit with a touch of machismo that this war story makes me secretly proud. Not of my dufus-ness, of course. But of my ability to engage these adventures with my runner's body. Being strong is giving me new opportunities to explore with my family, create memories, and enjoy all manner of excitements that would never have occurred to me in years past. That is worth so much more than the number on a scale could ever measure.

Notes: Some Tips for Trail Running on Hiking/Mountain Trails

1. Don't be like me. If you can, get some trail running shoes. The sturdier soles and support will help with rocks, muck, mulch, tree stumps, limbs and the rugged terrain. They will also prevent your "good" running shoes from getting trashed like mine did.

2. Even in the forest, put on sunblock.

3. Always have a terrain/trail map with you.

4. Wear sunglasses or prescription glasses. I was really glad for the old Rx pair that I use for running. When I took my fall, they protected my eyes.

5. A cap or hat is useful for keeping bugs, mulch, sun and sweat off your face. (I have a washable, wicking SPF cap that is pretty handy.)

5. Have someone take water, a snack, and a first aid kit in the hiking pack. I did not have the latter and wished for it once the aches set in.

6. When you are running, YOU MUST IGNORE THE SCENERY. You must keep your eyes down on the trail and at your feet at all times. The terrain is too rugged to run safely while sight-seeing.

Layout Design (c) 2007 Ann Hetzel Gunkel ; Photo (c) 2007 David Gunkel; Digital Supplies: Papers & Embellishments: Erica Hite's Daydream Collection at Scrap Girls
Ribbons: Thao Cosgrove's Friendship Collection at Scrap Girls.

On Hating Running

As I've noted before, when I first started this running thing, I hated it. To sum up, it sucked. But two years into it (and at my goal weight), I've learned a few interesting things about that initial hatred.

After a lot of running, I've gotten a lot better at listening to my own voice. To what some call "self talk." I can recall being over 200 pounds and trying like hell to run that one, slow mile. God, that was misery. But after some months, I realized that the misery wasn't in the running at all. It was in how I treated myself. Here's how a typical script went all of three minutes into a run.

"God, this sucks... It's hot... I hate this. I'm lame...Why am I so slow? How come I can't do anything right?... How come I'm fat and my ______ [neighbor, co-worker, friend] can eat whatever she wants to? I'll never be a real athlete.... Boy, am I fat...I bet I look like such a loser to that passer-by...I'll be a plus-size forever..."

You get the idea. I didn't hate the running nearly as much as I hated myself. Running just gave me a space and a chance to feel it directly. And believe it or not, this information took me months to hear. After some time running and some time working Weight Watchers, I started not only to listen to this self-talk but to change it. I would catch myself in the monologue of misery and put a stop to it. Then, I started to replace it:

"At least I'm out here doing it...I'm taking care of myself...I'm setting a good example for my son... Each of these steps gets me closer to a goal...Every day I do this is one more victory... I'm making improvements...A real runner is someone who runs. Period."

A year or two later (yeah, it actually takes a while), that old script is long gone. And when or if it should sneak back in--I'm on the lookout and ready to pounce.

Oh, and I don't hate running anymore.

Victory or "Why I'm not eating a layer cake to celebrate"

Way back in ancient times (well, as far back as last year when I first joined Weight Watchers), I had a lovely fantasy. There would be me at Goal Weight. I'm sure I looked good, although I couldn't quite picture it. I was confident and smooth, but I couldn't quite picture it. I was most likely wearing a small size jeans. And I'd be eating as much chocolate layer cake as I wanted to...oh, and lasagna and maybe something else extra tasty. Because thin people were people who could eat this stuff and still be thin.

Well...there's a reason WW is a gradual weight loss program. Because while you're busy changing your habits around food and exercise, you have enough time for your attitude to catch up, too. To wit:

When I hit my goal weight at WW, I jumped up and down like a maniac at the scale. And then I went home, proud and fulfilled by my progress. I wondered, what can I do to celebrate? I thought back to the "old me" and that fuzzy dream of one day being a "normal" size. And being able to eat all the "good stuff" without limit.

And you know what I realized? That the real victory wasn't that I was in the "thin club" and could now eat all the stuff to which the members of that secret society were privy. The real victory was somewhere else--somewhere that I had not expected at all. There I was at my goal weight and the reason I was there is that the idea of celebrating with a ton of cake or a sheet of lasagna seemed utterly empty to me. Why in God's name would I want to do that?

Aha! That was the secret. It wasn't that my thin colleagues could eat like lunatics. It was that they didn't want to do so as a way of celebrating, coping with or cheering their lives. The real victory happened when my former idea of "celebration" was as long gone and senseless to me as that elusive thin-person once seemed. Touche!

Eating to Run: Strawberry Tiramisu

I hate when someone tells me "it's as good as the real....[fill in the blank with tiramisu, fudge layer cake, etc.]." So I'm telling you, that this isn't! This isn't tiramisu with chocolate, liquer and marscapone. Are you nuts? However, this is a tasty and sweet 3 point dessert that takes about 10 minutes to assemble. So, enjoy!

Strawberry Tiramisu

Ingredients:
1 lb. fresh strawberries, chopped
3 T sugar
2 T orange juice
1/2 c. fat-free ricotta cheese
1/8 t. vanilla extract
1/4 c. vanilla (or strawberry) fat-free yogurt
1/3 of 1 (10 oz) frozen fat-free pound cake, cut into cubes

Directions:
1. Combine the strawberries, 2 tablespoons of the sugar and the orange juice in a bowl.
2. Puree (in a blender) the remining 1 T of sugar, and the vanilla. Add the yogurt and pulse just until blended. [You can skip the processor or blender and do this with a spoon.]
3. Layer (in a serving bowl or 4 individual bowls), the cake cubes, half of the cheese mixture and half of the strawberries. Then repeat the layers.
4. If you cover with plastic wrap and chill, the flavors will absorb and set even better.

Tip: You can cut the pound cake straight from the freezer. It will thaw by the time you eat dessert, even if you make it on the spot.

WW Points Value(1/4 of recipe): 3
Recipe: Adapted from Weight Watcher's Magazine, May/June 2007

Layout Design & Photo (c) Ann Hetzel Gunkel; Digital Supplies: Adobe Photoshop; Cherish Collection by Erica Hite at Scrap Girls; Friendship Collection by Thao Cosgrove at Scrap Girls

Reality Check: This is not your mother's diet

From the Goal Line, I now realize that the biggest obstacle I faced beginning the fitness and weight loss journey was the hurdle of my own preconceptions about Weight Watchers. I had a slew of misconceptions about what it was and who it was for. All of them were dead wrong. When my physician suggested WW, I almost gagged. I told her, frankly, that I thought it was "stupid" but I'd give her advice a try, since she's the doctor. Thank goodness I did. I was completely surprised by what transpired.

These are my misconceptions and what I discovered about them--because I'm betting you have some of these ideas, too.

Misconception No. 1: "WW is for old ladies or teenage girls." Reality check: REALLY wrong!!
My meeting is run by a man (an awesome leader, by the way.) My meeting is attended by young moms, senior men and women, teenagers, dads with young kids and the whole gamut. It is NOT ladies talking about dietetic chocolate bars or protein shakes. It is not about "rabbit food" or diet frozen dinners. Its about eating real food for real life. When I first heard about WW, I pictured my older cousins in the 1970s wearing polyester pantsuits and measuring out half cups of canned pineapple. Boy, oh boy, was I wrong!

Actor and WW member Greg Grunberg was in a cab in New York and this guy said, "Hey, I saw your commercial. Have you tried the lemon bars?" I'm like: You've got to be kidding me! This guy looks like one of the guys on The Sopranos--and he's on Weight Watchers! Everybody's on it. But it's not your grandmother's diet; it's not your mother's diet. It's your diet." Amen.

My childhood best friend, a guy, also joined WW and has hit his goal weight. [Paulie--you look fab!] By the way, WW online (which I adore) even has a whole new website just for guys.

Misconception No. 2: "I don't need WW. That's for weaklings and losers." Reality Check: This "Weakling & Loser" is now a real loser for the first time ever, thanks to WW. It works!

"Hey--I have a Ph.D., what do I need this for? Self-help books are for idiots and this is just a "group" version of a bad Dr. Phil show." Absolutely false. This is not vacuous self-help feel-good double talk. This is a real plan for health and fitness. It's not about personal strength, I.Q. or invincibility. It's not about how smart or strong you are. It's about behavior modification and habit changes. It's about strategies, a plan, information and sane progress. And stats are clear--these kinds of life changes work WAY better with group support.

Misconception No. 3: "WW isn't for me because I'm not a joiner and I hate groups." Reality Check: People who attend meetings lose THREE TIMES as much weight as those who don't. And after losing, those who did it with a group maintain their weight loss in vastly greater numbers.

I'm still not a joiner and I still hate groups. I'm as cynical and critical as they come. After all, I do cultural critique for a living! And guess what...this isn't a chat session on Oprah. This is not a twelve-step plan and there's no higher power to tap into except your own muscles. It's a real plan for health & fitness.

Misconception No. 4: "WW is just another diet plan." Reality Check: This is not a diet. It's a lifestyle change.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I don't do diets. That's why WW actually worked. This is not about deprivation, starvation or feminine discipline. This is not about low calorie shakes, boxes of prepackaged diet foods, protein bars, carb-phobia or the all-cabbage cure. This is about real food in healthy portions, mindful eating, and fitness. These are real life changes for a better and stronger life. Diets make Americans fat. Period. This is not a diet.

Eating to Run: Strawberry Rhubarb Crumble

I've always had a strange phobia about pre-historic-seeming plants and animals: the list includes rhubarb, sturgeon, and northern pike... If they "seem" prehistoric to my mind's eye, their perceived antiquity scares the bejeezus out of me. I know...it's odd. I think it's some peculiar philosophical vertigo when contemplating vast and epic stretches of time. I mean, how can that sturgeon at the bottom of Lake Michigan be over 200 years old? Creepy....

Anyhow, plants in this group include rhubarb--I can picture dinosaur limbs crushing its lush leaves across the millenia. When it grows like wild in spring, I find it scary. But somehow when David harvests it, mixes it with sugar, oatmeal and other good stuff...no prob! This Strawberry-Rhubarb Crumble is a tasty 3 point dessert that uses the bounty of rhubarb we find in our garden this time of year.

Fruit Layer:
4 cups chopped rhubarb
1 container chopped strawberries
1/3 cup brown sugar
1 t. quick-cooking tapioca
1 T grated orange zest
1/2 - 1 t. ground ginger

Topping:
1 1/2 c. rolled oats
1/4 c. flour
1/2 t. ground cinnamon
1 egg white
1 T. canola oil
1 t. vanilla extract
2 T. juice from orange

Preheat oven to 350. Combine fruit layer ingredients; mix and pour into baking pan sprayed with Pam cooking spray. Mix dry toppings. In separate bowl, whisk wet ingredients. Combine and spread over top of fruit. Cover with aluminum foil and bake for 20 minutes. Remove foil and bake for additional 20 - 30 minutes. Serve with fat free whipped cream, if desired.

Serving size: app. 1/2 cup
WW Points: 3 points per serving

Use whatever fresh fruits are in season. This version is perfect for our May bounty of garden rhubarb!

Recipe by David, adapted from WW Pure Comfort Cookbook and Moosewood Low-Fat Favorites.

Photo & Layout Design (c) 2007 Ann Hetzel Gunkel; Digital Supplies: Erica Hite's Cherish Collection at Scrap Girls & Thao Cosgrove's Friendship Collection at ScrapGirls

Goal Post

This is the Goal Post. I reached that elusive and seemingly surreal destination of my goal weight this past week. On Mother's Day, I hit the 50 pounds + lost mark. And finally, one school year later after joining WW, I achieved my milestone at Weight Watchers: hitting below my goal weight [52+ pounds lost.] I jumped up and down at the scale like a little kid, not quite sure that something so surreal was really happening to plus-size (no more) me. It was a major moment on the road to fitness. For the first time, the scale, my BMI, and my physician all agreed--I was neither obese nor overweight. That's a major life change. And a lot to absorb. The continuing challenges of maintenance will be forthcoming. But for now, I'm just basking in being a victorious road warrior.

Stats:
Total: -52 pounds lost
10 sizes & 24 inches less
Starting BMI: >33 Now: 24.8

Graphics: LO Design (c) 2007 Ann Hetzel Gunkel / Digital Products: Cherish Collection by Erica Hite at ScrapGirls; Fonts: Carvnivale Freakshow & Porcelain

NSV - Episode 4: Runner's High

It's real--not an apocryphal tale told to get you off your butt. Runners high does exist. And it comes in many forms. For me, it usually kicks in somewhere after around 40 minutes on the road. Suddenly, I'm just lighter and jollier than before. Sometimes I feel an amazing surge of renewed energy. Sometimes, like today, I find myself smiling or laughing--looking, no doubt, like a total loon to those I bypass. Sometimes, like today, I can get giddy, and find myself so preoccupied with the fun of running that I forget where I am.

That's what happened today, when a total stranger once again boosted my spirits. Last winter I wrote about the way folks cheered me on as I ran diligently the morning after a Chicago ice storm. Today it's a beautiful spring day in Chicago: the lilacs & bridal veils are in bloom, the sun shone down upon me, and as I raced past a crossing guard at the local school, he yelled, "Keep up the great work!" In an instant, I realized that it was the same guy from those months ago who had helped me on my way. So I yelled back as I zoomed past, "50 pounds lost," raising my arms in a mock Olympian finish-line gesture. He cheered again and called out, " Fantastic! God Bless you!"

I don't know this person's name. I've seen him twice in my life so far as I'm aware. But this complete stranger has boosted my spirits, encouraged my efforts and perked me up two-fold. That day last winter, I ran my first 8k. It seemed epic at the time. Yesterday, I ran my first 12K. It seemed epic, too. The journey continues on....aided by the enthusiasm and kindness of total strangers. Thanks to them, wherever they are, once again.

And as for runner's high, that unexpected cheering section buoyed me up such that a mile or two later, I realized I didn't even know where I was at--I was simply sailing on, lifted up by runner's high.

Peace through Strength

Peace through Strength: Orwellian nightmare or neo-Con military-industrial doubletalk? Both, of course. But I've just recently found a way that this odd turn of phrase makes sense. For women becoming fit and active, sometimes for the first time in their lives, gaining physical strength can be an amazing path to contentment and peace with self.

Whether at Weight Watchers meetings or online running groups, one hears over and over again from women, "I never thought I could do anything right. I never thought I could accomplish anything. But now...."

Let me amend that slightly. I've always been fortunate enough to be able to accomplish things. In fact, not to toot my own horn, I've got stacks of accomplishments: a Ph.D. in Postmodern Philosophy, a lovely family, a good life as an energetic and effective Professor, a second career as an artist, speaking & reading several languages, a Fulbright fellowship, living and studying abroad numerous times. And to top it off, I still find myself hand-making the invitations, decorations and favors for every one of my son's birthday parties. In many ways, I'm the horrifying embodiment of the "superwoman" with all it entails (good and bad.) But despite all that, I've never actually felt a sense of accomplishment. Indeed, nothing has ever been enough to undo that nagging feeling that I wasn't quite good enough.

Well, that has changed. Peace through strength is the miraculous uncovery of confidence in a middle aged psyche and middle aged body. How is it possible that something so "trivial" as my diet and exercise could transform this lifelong lack? Women's sports activist and first woman to run the Boston Marathon, Katherine Switzer says, "Most of our lives we're not in situations where we feel strong. But we realize through running that we are powerful and that we have stamina..." She's dead right. As I run and run and run, I'm in touch--maybe for the first time ever--with my own strength, my own ability and my own power.

In short, it rocks. It has transformed my attitude about myself in a way that no list of abilities and achievements ever did. Suddenly, I've got (inner) peace through strength.

NSV - Episode 3: Jean Therapy

The non scale victories (NSV) are often the most fun. I'm not vain (too much); merely amazed. Perfect blood pressure and cholesterol: cool. Size 6 jeans for the first time in my life: really cool.

I love running!

Layout Design (c) 2007 Ann Hetzel Gunkel
Supplies: Papers, Staples & Butterflies: City Camo Collection by design butcher at ScrapGirls; Measuring Tapes: ScrapSimple Embellishments: Measuring Tapes by Mandy Steward at ScrapGirls; Rickrack: Poppy Love Collection by design butcher at ScrapGirls; Tag: Vintage Spring Collection by design butcher at ScrapGirls; Stitching: Alphabet Soup Boy Collection by Erica Hite; City Camo Collection by design butcher at ScrapGirls; Photos: David Gunkel; Fonts: Virginia Plain, Eraser Dust, Minion, CK Script